I hope not?

I love these words from Nick Cave.

But forgive my arrogance for speaking over a wordsmith like Nick, but hope is not the correct word to use.

Hope is flaccid , it does not look life straight in the eye. Holding its gaze with humility, and the hunger of a tiger.

Hope does not stand up in the storm, falls, and then gets back up. Hope can be squashed by those who have more time, energy and resources.

It is an imaginary friend, place or thing which is forever over the horizon.

There is a word which means the right action, the loving action. The action which brings into this world the love, the connection and the joy which we desire.

For ourselves and those around us.

What is that word ?

Is there even a word for it?

Would Nick have hoped for the death of his son? If he knew what it would teach him? Who he would become? Was it inevitable?

We must be careful what we hope for. Because we do not know in what form it will be delivered. This is the folly of hope. And the power of that word, which alludes me.

Until we find it, for now, I am glad that Nick has found peace and redemeption in this life time. I wish the price it cost him and his family was much, much less.

But the higher our arrogance, the higher the fall. Is this a cruel thing to say? Or the right thing to say?

All I know is that I feel that the world is a better place with this Nick Cave in it, than the Nick Cave of my youth.

This Nick I can speak with, this Nick I can cry with. I know this Nick, because I can feel him now. The wall of arrogance and cynicism is gone.

Or maybe I do not know anything, Nick, or myself? And my fall is coming?

Until then I will keep trying to find that word.

Sarah Wilson